So I’m doing this column on Medium that’s sort of about personal development but I’ve been thinking of it more in the vein of Letters to a Young Technologist because I think much of Medium’s audience works in the tech/startup world. The post I wrote this week came out of listening to 20somethings I know justify a lifestyle that consists entirely of work and casual sex on the basis that they don’t have time for real relationships because they’re busy building an awesome product/company/internet meme involving cats, Kim Jong Un and screen shots of 30 Rock. In some cases, “I don’t have time” is just shorthand for “I’d rather just screw around right now”, which is fine, but most of them really mean it. They think the payoff from living in the office will outweigh the payoff of working hard and still making time for other people. I think this is short-sighted, and honestly, it makes me sad. A lot of these people are lonely and they rely too heavily on their colleagues and workplace for emotional fulfillment because they haven’t nurtured their personal relationships (even the platonic ones) enough.
So I wrote a post on Why Developing Relationships in Your 20s Matters and why it’s actually a practical thing to do. (I realize that some people envision themselves lifelong bachelors and bachelorettes and it may not apply, but I think it does to most people who anticipate having a spouse and children at some point.)